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9 Reasons : self Sabotaging Weight Loss and Exercise Efforts

9 Reasons : self Sabotaging Weight Loss and Exercise Efforts

9 Reasons : self Sabotaging Weight Loss and Exercise Efforts

It’s human nature to dislike change and abhor any sense of deprivation. weight loss sabotage


That’s why it’s little wonder that so many people end up sabotaging their attempts to lose weight and stick to an exercise regimen.


Sigmund Freud keenly observed years ago that “there are no accidents”. If you find yourself starting diet after diet – always determined to succeed “this time” – and yet consistently fail to reach your goals or put the weight you lost right back on, then the most likely cause is self-sabotage.


It’s no accident that it’s happening; it’s time to stop blaming it on a sluggish metabolism or your innate inability to burn fat.


You Are Not Alone


Before you beat yourself up and reach for that bag of chips to make yourself feel better (step awaaay from the cupboard… :) , take heart in the fact that you’re far from alone.


The tendency to sabotage your well-intended attempts to lose weight and exercise regularly is very common. Not only that, the potential reasons for doing so are practically endless.


To make things worse, many of them occur at a subconscious – or even unconscious – level.


It’s impossible to change something if you don’t know what you need to change.


But don’t despair – once you recognize the reason (or reasons, as is very often the case) why you end up defeating yourself over and over, you’ll be empowered to make the necessary changes that will allow you to finally succeed in your weight loss efforts.


In this brief series of articles, we’ll look at some of the most common reasons for self-sabotage when it comes to losing weight and exercising more.


As you read each one, take some time to consider whether or not it resonates with you. Don’t be surprised if you have several “ah ha” moments as you go along. Be grateful if those occur, because awareness is the first step towards making positive changes.


At the end of each article you’ll find some tips to help you start overcoming these obstacles. One caveat: don’t expect miracles overnight.


Many of these subtle saboteurs are deeply ingrained and, as mentioned above, have been occurring without your awareness.


Old habits and patterns don’t die easily, but they can definitely be overcome in time. With conscious effort, you can finally begin having the success that has eluded you for so long!



A final note: consider investing in a journal as you begin this journey.


Writing down your thoughts, feelings, and new-found insights can be very therapeutic (and a lot less expensive than going to a psychologist for several sessions!)


You’ll be amazed at how much you’ll discover about yourself along the way.


Today we’re going to talk about 9 very common saboteurs: Let’s take a close look at how each one can quickly sidetrack your efforts.


Reason #1 – You Have Unrealistic Goals


Having unrealistic weight loss and exercise goals is a set-up for failure.


Although it took months or even years to gain all that extra weight, if you’re like most people you want it gone yesterday.


Perhaps ultra-fast weight loss isn’t the goal; maybe your (unrealistic) goal is to look like a borderline-anorexic Victoria’s Secret model or to run a half marathon 6 weeks from now (after being sedentary for the past few years).


Besides being unattainable, unrealistic goals lead to disappointment and may quickly deflate your motivation.


As a result, you may give up too soon or stop trying altogether. Unless you realize and accept that your goals need to be adjusted, your inability to attain them will make you feel like a failure and cause your self-esteem to plummet even further.


You may even blame yourself, believing that you lack willpower and self-discipline. If you succumb to that line of thinking (without recognizing its flaws), you’ll question your ability to ever succeed – and you may stop trying altogether.


Reason #2 – You Create a Vicious Cycle of Guilt, Self-loathing, and Emotional Eating Whenever You “Slip”


This is a common problem for anyone who’s trying to lose weight.


You expect yourself to be perfect.


You start your diet with enthusiasm and gusto, and then, just a few days into it, you slip.


You eat something forbidden and next thing you know, you’re feeling so guilty that you stuff yourself in angry self-loathing to make yourself feel better.


Why? Because you blew it! (Or at least that’s what you tell yourself.)


Let’s face it; food is food – we’re not talking about committing a felony here when you give in to your craving for some chocolate. Everyone slips now and again; it’s not the end of the world.


You’re doomed to failure, however, if you allow excessive guilt to consume you when you don’t stick to your diet and exercise program perfectly.


This isn’t AA – you don’t have to start counting your days of sobriety all over just because you couldn’t resist that cupcake. You’re not going to go to hell; you’re not going to lose the love and respect of your friends; and you’re not going to be sentenced to 10 years in prison for your “crime”.


Okay?


Accept that you’re human (which, btw, is synonymous for “imperfect”), forgive yourself, and get right back on track. The less time you dwell on it, the better.


Reason #3 – You Don’t Feel Deserving or Worthy


It’s almost impossible to allow yourself to have something good in your life – a higher-paying job, a happy relationship, or a fit, svelte body – if you feel (on some level) that you don’t really deserve it.


Low self-esteem and deep-seated feelings of unworthiness typically go hand in hand and are not uncommon – especially for anyone who’s been overweight much of their life.


If you believe that you’re not worthy of being slender and looking great, then you’re always going to find some way to either sabotage your weight loss efforts or gain the weight back once you lose it.


You may not even realize how deep those feelings of unworthiness go.


Unless and until you acknowledge them and start changing them, they’ll continue to get in your way.


Reason #4 – You Feel Too Depriveddiet sabotage


No one likes to feel deprived.


Sadly, many diets – especially overly strict ones – require a significant amount of deprivation.


There are few things that will make you sabotage your efforts more quickly.


Deprivation often elicits feelings of anger, frustration, and resentment – to name a few. And, as we’ve mentioned before, those feelings tend to undermine your weight loss efforts and exercise goals.


Some degree of deprivation is inevitable when you’re trying to lose weight.


After all, you can’t eat everything and anything and expect the numbers on the scale to go any direction but up. The stricter the diet, the greater the deprivation will be.


This is one of the reasons why fad diets (which often focus on eating a lot of one type of food or excluding an entire food category) and extreme diets (e.g. very low calories diets or liquid diets) frequently lead to failure.


People simply can’t handle that much self-inflicted deprivation for very long without rebelling or throwing in the towel.


Reason #5 – You’re Not Taking Responsibility For Your Weight


I hate to be blunt here, but unless someone’s force-feeding you or you eat while you’re sleepwalking, you really can’t blame anyone else but yourself for your excess weight.*


If you’re blaming someone (or something) else (e.g. your mother, your spouse, your 5 pregnancies, etc.) for your weight issues, then that’s likely the reason you’re sabotaging your weight loss efforts.


Until you take personal, full responsibility for your excess weight, you’re going to keep sabotaging your efforts. This is because any lasting change must come from within, and that can’t occur until you own the problem.


(*It should be noted that there are a few exceptions to this, such as certain medications or a medical problem that caused your weight gain – but be careful to assign blame to one of these only if there is plenty of evidence to back it up; otherwise, it may just be another excuse.)


Reason #6 – You Don’t Believe You Can Succeed


There’s an interesting phenomenon that occurs whenever we believe something about ourselves – we do everything we can to make that belief become a self-fulfilling prophecy.


In other words, if you don’t believe you can succeed in achieving your weight loss and exercise goals, then you won’t.


That’s almost a given.


Often, the reasons you don’t believe in your ability to succeed include:


1. A history of failures
2. Your goals are so big they feel completely unattainable (with this one, always check to make sure your goals are truly realistic)
3. You don’t feel you have sufficient motivation


Reason #7 – You Don’t Know How to Cope With Negative Emotions


This is a very common weight loss obstacle, so if it applies to you, you’re in very good company.


If eating is your only – or primary – way of coping with negative emotions, then you’re probably going to sabotage all your diet efforts.


Common negative emotions include boredom, anger, frustration, disappointment, sadness, fear, and loneliness.


Emotional eating is one of the main causes of unwanted weight gain and obesity. Unfortunately, most of us were inadvertently taught to turn to food for comfort when we were still infants.


We cried – and our mother held us and fed us to stop our tears and make us feel better.


That’s a powerful message.


As we got older, we were given cookies and candy when we fell and scraped our knee or were teased by kids at school.


It’s no wonder so many people struggle with emotional eating. You learned to quickly revert to eating for comfort, despite your determination and best intentions to succeed at weight loss


Reason #8 – You’ve Got Too Much on Your Plate


Changing your eating habits and incorporating a regular exercise routine into your busy schedule takes a lot of planning and effort.


If you’ve already got a lot on your plate or are under a lot of stress, you’re likely to undermine your weight loss efforts.


Sadly, the subsequent feeling of failure often adds additional stress.


This may not be the time to take on a major weight loss endeavor or exercise regimen.


Reason #9 – Your Weight Has Been a Protective Barrier


For some people, especially women, extra layers of fat offer a means of protection against unwanted sexual attention.


This is often true if you have a history of childhood sexual abuse.


By gaining weight over the years, you may have been subconsciously been trying to protect yourself from further abuse.


Extra weight can also serve to protect you from intimacy. Even though you may not have been sexually abused, you may have an underlying fear of letting anyone “in” or get too close.


Intimacy requires vulnerability and that can be very scary for a lot of people.


Being overweight – and especially being obese – allows you to avoid the very intimacy you may desire but fear so deeply.


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